For women it’s different but many guys immediately turn to online dating sites as a coping mechanism after going through a break-up. It’s typical behaviour that’s frequently motivated by a variety of individual goals and emotional requirements. Your ex might be doing this right now – but why?
Top reasons he is back on dating sites after breaking-up
There are many reasons why your ex-boyfriend or ex-husband might turn to online dating sites after you go your separate ways. Not all might be applicable, but here’s an insight into some of the reasons why that may be the case.
1. He is looking for immediate comfort
Break-ups are hard. Whilst you might seek comfort in your girlfriends, family, or a bucket of ice cream, your ex will have different mechanisms. Truth be told, he is navigating through a sea of emotions, from sorrow and confusion, and a deep sense of loneliness. And like yourself, he is probably feeling vulnerable, and seeking comfort by going on an online dating site is a way to combat this – at least in the short-term.
Simply put, dating services provide simple access to solace. It only takes a few clicks to get started and initiate a conversation with someone. Believe it or not, this can help ease his sorrow of loss and foster some sense of solidarity.
2. It’s a distraction
Getting lost in the online dating scene can be a very effective way for him to escape the emotional upheaval that followed your break-up. To get his mind off it, he will turn his focus onto the profiles of other women and start conversations rather than wallowing in the pain of loss or obsessing over memories of your former relationship.
Finding someone fresh and fascinating might be a delightful diversion from the agony of your Nettsted her heartbreak. Online dating provides a thrill and sense of anticipation that can help alleviate depressing and hopeless sentiments from your break-up, where every new encounter he makes offers a chance for exploration and possibilities.
In addition, the sheer diversity and quantity of possible matches on dating services can be addictive, offering him a nice break from the mental exhaustion associated with your break-up.
3. It’s his way of rebounding
Re-entering the online dating environment immediately following a break-up is a typical go-to method for guys, and your ex is no exception. Knowing it or not knowing it, he might think that the best way to get over his heartbreak is to throw himself into a new rebound relationship or casual interaction. This could be due to him wanting to find gratitude from others, finding more self-esteem, becoming less lonely, or finding a shallow and casual relationship.
4. He is seeking validation
People naturally start to doubt their value and desirability after a break-up, particularly if it is unplanned or extremely painful. For him, searching for self-approval on dating sites may be a lifesaver in his vulnerable state. He might feel that he needs to reaffirm his attractiveness and desirability in the eyes of others, such as receiving comments and interest from other women.
This can go a long way to a much-needed confidence boost. This outside affirmation might help him heal the emotional scars left by the break-up by providing him with a short-term ego boost to confidence and self-worth.
True confidence and self-worth only come from the inside, even though the praise and attention he receives on dating services may provide temporary relief and ego boost his sense of self-worth. His over-reliance on outside validation on dating apps can lead to a vicious circle of dependency where his self-worth is determined by other people’s acceptance.
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